Deadpool DEMANDS you buy stuff!

It’s nearly Valentine’s Day so I DEMAND you select one (or 15) of my very favorite items featuring my attitude or likeness accurately rendered in cotton, vinyl, plastic (other than vinyl), ash-trays, plungers, skillets and diaphragms. Okay, let’s kind of ignore those last four items, although….ladies, if the diaphragm idea has value, my product development team is all ears. We can certainly add it to the next list of my favorite Valentine’s Day merchandise!

So, yes, I’ve got a lot of REALLY GREAT, Deadpool-themed merchandise that translates well to Valentine’s Day gifts for the person currently unable to free themselves from 50 yards of duct tape securing them to a chair. Yup.

Oh, so I guess you want me to TELL YOU about this product I’m going on about. Fine, jerk; get ready for Deadpool’s favorite Merchandise (that also happens to be perfect for a certain pretend holiday having to do with forced feelings conveyed through overly used, impersonal, card-written clichés expressed by complete strangers)!!

Oh, and I also linked these items with an especially clever, moderately chaotic narrative. Why? Because everyone enjoys a good story, even if it contains absolutely no character development, an overtly transparent plot and absolutely no conflict or resolution. ENJOY!

Deadpool LOVES V-Day!
Deadpool LOVES V-Day!

Like any of the items highlighted in my twisty, turny little tale? Yes? Then click on the BIG RED BUTTON to view my ENTIRE SELECTION of Deadpool merchandise. Now, let’s take a quick look at each item conveyed during my corkscrew story. Yes, being this helpful is absolutely NOT a lasting virtue of mine so I IMPLORE you to take advantage.

It’s the Deadpool Black 30 Single Costume T-Shirt ($21.99)!

It’s the Deadpool Chimichanga Shack T-Shirt ($21.99)!

It’s the Deadpool Envelope Wallet with Chain ($21.99)!

It’s the Deadpool All Over Print Crew Socks ($11.99)

It’s the Deadpool Jump & Shoot Cold Cup w/ Straw ($12.99)

It’s the…uh…Batman Vs Superman Do You Bleed T-Shirt ($19.99)!

It’s the Deadpool Thumbs Up Pop Vinyl Bobblehead ($12.99)!

It’s the Deadpool Has Issues Women’s T-Shirt ($23.99)!

It’s the Deadpool Shark Punch 30 Single T-Shirt ($18.99)!

It’s the Deadpool Image Circle Raglan T-Shirt ($29.99)!

It’s the Deadpool Symbol Red & Black 59Fifty Cap ($34.99)!

It’s the Deadpool Portal Piece of Cake 30 Single T-Shirt ($21.99)

It’s the Deadpool Riveting Tale 30 Single T-Shirt ($21.99)

WHEW!

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