Hey there again folks! It’s me, Marvel’s Regenerating Degenerate Deadpool. I am ever so fond of that title and one I had to earn…much like that creepy German guy in Quentin Tarantino’s Green Hornet. Wait, no. That might not be the correct answer but I did just dislodge a fork from my head. I probably shouldn’t have made that comment to Hugh Jackman about Wolverine: Origins. Oh, that cheeky little bugger…he always had some fight in him!
Okay, so look…it is awfully cold outside and I don’t think all of you are gifted with an unnatural healing factor or my devilishly good looks. It takes skill to look like a map of Utah, you know? My first suggestion to you is this mighty Deadpool hoodie that features me, the bestest superhero in all the land! I once had to pull a chimmichanga from an enchanted stone…or was that the backseat of my car and the chimmichanga had been left there for quite some time? Either way, the magic deemed me worthy. Hooray!
Of course you’ll need a Deadpool beanie to go with that sweet hoodie. Might I suggest this fine beanie from New Era? New Era is known for pretty much making all the hats for sports…which is great because I am a fan of baseball bats. They just have a certain ring to them, you know? They have such a nice kiss while somebody is cracking you across the head. Leave those aluminum ones at home though. Those things sting a bit too much…even for me!
If you don’t feel like venturing out because you can order everything online(go figure), you could always lounge about in this great Deadpool robe! You’ll be just like ‘The Dude’ but you’ll have to make your own White Russians. While you are at it, could you maybe make me one or two or thirty five? Actually, go with the last number. I don’t have anything to do and its the weekend!