I FINALLY SAW DEADPOOL! I REALLY, REALLY LIKED IT! A LOT! It made me laugh! It made me cry! But more importantly, it made me laugh so hard I cried through the laughter of my cry-filled laughter! WHAT?? Anyway, I really enjoyed it and I’m still gifted by lingering, gracious guffaws! Now, I really need your help here; because there were SO MANY funny moments – and I’ve only seen it once – I’m having a very hard time organizing the bits that really kicked me in the crotch…er…uh…tickled my funny crotch…er, bone. Tickled my funny bone. Anyway, I have a few ideas (listed below) but I’m kind of tired, a little hungover, and basically, I really want you to do my work for me. Yes, I’m asking you to please help me compile my list of Deadpool’s funniest movie moments! Here are a few of those previously mentioned ideas to get us started!
Oh, and before you continue reading, you need to realize that the points listed below, and the ones added by our readership in the comments (below the below), will definitely be weighted by overly dense, grossly unstable, chemically communicable spoiler material.
Deadpool Breaks a Bone Every Time He Strikes Colossus
Furious that his distracting argument with Colossus leads to Ajax’s escape, Deadpool forgoes reason and takes a few shots at the X-Men’s reflective, organically armored titan. The result? The severe breakage of several bones leading to an immobile, nearly amorphous Deadpool.
Deadpool Receives Sexual Stimulation from a Stuffed Unicorn.
Through one of the more brilliantly applied flashback sequences, Deadpool “accidentally” lands on an unintended, somewhat inappropriate historical moment: the “handling of his business” with the titillating assistance of a stuffed Unicorn. Hmmmm.
Vanessa Carlysle Calls a Brutish Suitor, “Fat Gandalf.”
When Wade and Vanessa meet for the first time, they quip a bit and trade some terrible, seemingly exaggerated truths regarding their uniquely traumatic upbringings. In the midst of this, an older, rounder, bearded fellow touches Vanessa inappropriately. Vanessa’s response is to grab said bearded suitor by the monkey nuggets and call him a “fat Gandalf.” HAH! Not sure why I found this especially pleasing, but…but…HAH!
Okay, so those were 3 scenes from the Deadpool movie that I found to be especially hilarious. Now, dear readers, it’s up to you to help me continue and compile my list of Deadpool’s funniest movie moments!
Go! And thanks! And go!