With Disney releasing a full trailer for Star Wars: The Force Awakens during tomorrow’s airing of Monday Night Football, they went and sprinkled gunpowder on the already stoked flames of maddening anticipation by revealing a brand new Star Wars: The Force Awakens Teaser Trailer! AAAAH! That cry? It’s the cry of one standing over flames granted augmented ferocity by the aforementioned gunpowder dusting of unbelievably exciting news! With the release of this Star Wars: The Force Awakens Teaser Trailer, we here at The Source are having a heck of a time trying to accomplish anything while reenacting the teaser trailer with our remote controlled BB-8, and an old costume wig. Yes, I’m trying to get a handle on Rey’s character, but I’m having difficulty finding my motivation (fear the evil spaceships, Tiras!).
Anyway, this eleven second teaser trailer for Star Wars: The Force Awakens focuses on Jakku native Rey (played by actress Daisy Ridley) looking to the sky and examining, with great concern and an appropriate amount of terror, the foreboding fly-by’s of First Order spacecraft. As Rey looks on, we hear this same concern in the measured, wilting beeps of BB-8. What’s he saying? Well, our resident expert on the BB-8 series of companion droids states that, although unable to extrapolate an exact phrase or meaningful series of words, the droid is heavily implying the following statement: “Holy (expletive noun for stool), we are so (expletive describing unfortunate state of affairs)! I really mean it this time, Rey. We are so unbelievably (repeating expletive describing unfortunate state of affairs)! ”
And there you have it! So, how psyched are you for the full Star Wars: The Force Awakens trailer airing tomorrow night? As excited as I am? Doubtful. Honestly, I’ll be minding what I eat tomorrow because seeing this trailer may cause me to (expletive verb for passing stool) my pants. Literally.
Star Wars: The Force Awakens hits theaters December 18th, 2015, starring Harrison Ford, Mark Hamill, Carrie Fisher, Anthony Daniels, Peter Mayhew, Kenny Baker, John Boyega, Daisy Ridley, Adam Driver, Oscar Isaac, Andy Serkis, Domhnall Gleeson, Gwendoline Christie, Lupita Nyong’o and Max von Sydow.