The 12 Days of Deadpool celebration strikes again! The 12 Days of Deadpool promotion features newly released, Deadpool movie-themed goodness each and every day leading up to, well….tomorrow. What’s tomorrow? Yes, it’s Christmas day, but it’s also the debut of a brand new Deadpool movie trailer on ESPN! YAY! Will it show Deadpool? Probably. How much Deadpool? Probably a liberal amount of Deadpool. Will it show Deadpool killing people with the use of exploding badgers or sentient bear traps named Carl, Mike, Kenneth and Marvin? I don’t know. Maybe?
Anyway, get rid of your yule log, submerge it in the tub you use to power-wash your ‘Elf on a Shelf’ and throw it outside. Now, get rid of your yule log video. Now, get rid of the Darth Vader Yule Log video (yes, there’s one of those, too). Have you done everything I asked? Good. Now sit back and relax; Deadpool just dropped a bag of burning poop on someone’s porch and…it’s going to be a while. How long? About an hour and ten minutes.
Yes, sit back and enjoy the sound of cracking, flickering, popping and burning coils of excrement lovingly packaged in a white paper bag considerately illustrated by Deadpool himself. Take in the lavish, layered, orchestral Christmas hymns, the brass, reflective kick plate covering the door’s base, and the…uh…I lost my train of thought. I mean, there’s a burning bag of poop on the porch! C’MON!
So, in summation, the new Deadpool movie trailer hits tomorrow on ESPN. The Deadpool movie hits theaters on 2/12/2016. I hit the gym every morning at 6am and then throw up Count Chocula cereal after 75 seconds on a treadmill.